Umbrellas
Hi! If you asked someone to quickly say something synonymous with London they might say red buses, fish and chips, pigeons and so on. But if you asked me I would say cheap, black umbrellas.
Now we have a lot of rain and gusty wind so the other day (as I did many times last year) I went to Oxford Street - London's hinterland for cheap weather protective goods - and brought a small, black umbrella for L3. Why did I do this? I should know better of course. It started to rain. Up went my umbrella, gust of wind, and the tiny thing reversed itself, bending its puny struts and contorting into a 'modern' art exhibit from the Tate. A French student of mine once sold 50,000 coffee filters to a French supermarket. 'Professor,' he said to me in heavily accented French, 'you know the interesting thing about those coffee filters'? 'They double up as mosquito nets?', I replied. He snorted (the sellers do that a lot on Oxford Street). 'None of them work. They are all useless. But the shop sells them for almost nothing and at that price the customers don't expect them to work.' I see.
What is a quality umbrella?
So there we have the psycho-dynamics of cheap, black umbrella purchases. But I have decided to do something about it. What is a quality umbrella, how much is it and where can I buy it?
The Victorianesq James Smith and Son on New Oxford Street - www.james-smith.co.uk - have supplied umbrellas and sticks to the British public (including royalty and several prime ministers) since 1830. Their cheapest mini-umbrella is a 'Fulton' (www.fultonumbrellas.com ) at around L9. They also sell gentlemen's walking sticks ('Something for the King's Road on a summers day Sir? Then may I suggest the Silver Tipped Malaca walking sick ') and are obviously really into their products.
Everything but guaranty
Surprisingly, James Smith do recommend that you will get many years of service from one of their umbrellas if you DO NOT take it out in 'torrential rain or very strong winds.' Great umbrella. Only use it when the suns out. Lasts for ever you know. And, 'Do not lend your James Smith umbrella even to your closest friend. Give them our address instead.' The secrecy of it all! And only to find, when you get there, that its longevity is all but guaranteed if you don't use it when it rains!
Another useful online resource is www.simplyumbrellas.co.uk .
A good umbrella should have a wind resistant frame, extra ribbed canvass for added element protection and a rubber handle for grip. The fulton 'Typhoon' meets this description exactly.
Walking in the rain
London has many superb walks. If it's raining (lightly) and you are worried that it may start to rain heavily thus necessitating in a mad rush home to rest an umbrella you bought from a shop address given you by your closest friend, then, the walk to Buckingham Palace from Pall Mall is perfect at around 20 minutes. Start at Admiralty Arch (south of Trafalgar Square). Your walk will take you past - or through if you prefer - the royal St. James Park (www.royalparks.org.uk ) with its lake, ducks and pelicans. The Inn in the Park (famous for its turf roof: www.innthepark.com ) is an excellent coffee stop. At the end of the park is Buckingham Palace. I like this walk as its short, interesting, with quick access to buses and tubes if the weather suddenly takes a turn for the worst.